a wedding i did not dream of

almost all of the girls i know have a dream wedding. dress, venue, theme, guests, song they want while they walk down the aisle, first dance, etc... not me. not every thing. 

there was only one thing i want - a short engagement. it turned out that i got engage exactly two years  early before i got married. what i wanted did not happen but God is an amazingly amazing planner.

"everything works out together for good to those who love Him and are called according to His purpose"

this has become true for ranley & i.

my wedding turned out to be much better than i could have ever planned. 

pinterest is awesome. and so are friends & family. 

so here's some photos before the ceremony:

  

for the record i would like to say that ranley & i are not cut out to a life of modeling. i mean, i look at magazines and this super glossy pictures of people who look really put together - hair in place, clothes just right, perfect little smile or pout - and i say to myself, i want to look like that. i have an idea it must be a hard, i did not know it was really hard. 

but we had so much fun & bloopers shooting this photos. i think james & his team made a very good coach and they were very patient. ranley & i are both not all that comfortable having our photos taken while there are audience (some of our guests arrived early) and we don't know how to pose! 

for a couple of inept and amateur poser we did pretty good, eh? 

these photos are amazing to me because in them we did not have our eye close, we're not picking our nose, etc 

ceremony/reception venue: garden & pool area, rancho cancio

video: Onins

hmua: bien ybanez hair & make-up

coordination & planning: ivy faith miranda 

styling: ivy faith mirand & jen tejas

flowers: pearl flowers

caterer: chai catering

music: mcof band

singer: kim mendiola

lights: alvin pepito

photography: air balloon project & che somber

latest discovery

I have discovered lately that love is a very powerful force that can and is able to change one's outlook and the way we perceive things. that when we love truly and deeply, we not only change ourselves but we also affect and change the object of our affection. "our lives are shaped and fashioned by the people who loves us and those who refuses to love us" - this adage is true in many sense.


i am so blessed to be allowed and given the opportunity to love someone. it is an overwhelming emotion and a big responsibility. everyday i wake up and think, "how can i treat this person with more respect and gratitude; how can i show him that i care and that all i could think of is his well-being and how can i make him happy?"


but despite the seemingly awesome and generous display of emotion and actions when your in love, there is also this fear that creeps up slowly... fear of losing yourself so thoroughly that you lose you own identity, fear of not being able to give enough - of your time, effort, resources, affections. and ultimately fear that despite that maybe person you showered all your passion too will not love you back the way you expected to be love.


for there is no crushing disappointment, no wound so deep, no hurt so depressing than if your love isn't reciprocated.


but then again, the word of God, the Bible, teaches us that true love does not expect nothing in return. it isn't conditional and is very sacrificial. so when we love, we are much neared to the nature of our Lord Jesus Christ, for his very nature is love.

boring excitement

spent my whole 5 days in the confines of a conference hall listening to trainers from Compassion Manila office. learned a lot and it was not as boring as i thought it should be. when i asked margie to let me go i thought i was entering martyrdom... ask her and everyone else at work i'm not very good in blending in with the older crowds that composed the project directors of 20 or so local projects in the visayas region.

towards the end though i have had a change of heart, i felt excited of going back to the center and tell my team all the encouraging stuff the group did and learned. i was especially touched by this video of a korean pastor who did not think it beneath him to shine shoes in order to support the 7 children he was sponsoring. i cried buckets over that and i tell you im not a cry baby.

i work firsthand with the kids... doing field and hands on work and most of the time it feels kind of monotonous doing the everyday stuff we're doing at the office.... the letters, the case studies, the home and school visitations and usual weekly classes.... then with this training/conference i was reminded of the end purpose why i do what i do. the children have all big dreams... to be an engineer, to be a general in the army, to be a president like obama, to be miss Philippines, etc.... the poor children that are our beneficiaries have little or no opportunity at all to reach their dreams unless someone reach out and help them. thank God for kind-hearted, amazingly generous sponsors who never tire of giving what they can out of the abundance of their hearts. what we do on our end, as field people, are just a small portion of the whole thing that is :

... bragging would be a good thing if i say that we already have children who once were wide-eyes, runny-nose beneficiaries and are now co-laborer in the Lord... that's our proudest moments... if all the sponsor can only see the impact of what they have done and are still doing, the kind words in their letters, the small stickers they send, the small gift every christmas, the musical card they send for birthdays, the pictures - the offering of prayers for the family. its not just for their sponsored kids - i've seen mothers and fathers cried because the sponsor of their children told them, "you are my family" or you are my daughter or my son".

one sponsor sent a hundred bucks and was confused when she recieved a letter from her child that they are thankful that she sent them the gift because they were able to buy a house. a house!? she wrote back, "how come? it was only a hundred bucks!" Yes! they bought a small house... with leaking roof and holes on the bamboo floor... but it was finally theirs! they have been praying for it ever since they could remember and the the sponsor made the little boys and his whole family's dream come true.

"there is no thing as a small gift" --- in my personal opinion, appreciated or not every gift that is given makes a huge difference in the lives of every child - the child's family and ultimately the community.

like i said i change my mind about the conference. boring and monotonous? a tinies bit (lol). exciting and challenging? yes, check! check!
I am helping change the lives of the little ones and if that does not excite me i better find a thoroughly boring job like banking? (no offense meant, i hate numbers :-D)