i am reading again the 7 habits of highly effective people! and writing this is my own way of processing.
"In stark contrast, almost all the literature in the first 150 years or so focused on what could be called the character ethic as the foundation of success -- things like integrity, humility, fidelity, temperance, courage, justice, patience, industry, simplicity, modesty, and the Golden Rule. Benjamin Franklin's autobiography is representative of that literature. It is, basically, the story of one man's effort to integrate certain principles and habits deep within his nature.
The character ethic taught that there are basic principles of effective living, and that people can only experience true success and enduring happiness as they learn and integrate these principles into their basic character.
But shortly after World War I the basic view of success shifted from the character ethic to what we might call the personality ethic. Success became more a function of personality, of public image, of attitudes and behaviors, skills and techniques, that lubricate the processes of human interaction. This personality ethic essentially took two paths: one was human and public relations techniques, and the other was positive mental attitude (PMA). Some of this philosophy was expressed in inspiring and sometimes valid maxims such as “Your attitude determines your altitude,” “Smiling wins more friends than frowning,” and "Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe it can achieve.
Other parts of the personality approach were clearly manipulative, even deceptive, encouraging people to use techniques to get other people to like them, or to fake interest in the hobbies of others to get out of them what they wanted, or to use the “power look,” or to intimidate their way through life.
Some of this literature acknowledged character as an ingredient of success, but tended to compartmentalize it rather than recognize it as foundational and catalytic. Reference to the character ethic became mostly lip service; the basic thrust was quick-fix influence techniques, power strategies, communication skills, and positive attitudes".
this is a very good observation on what is going around us. though the character ethic is more like the fruit of the spirit.
and to truly succeed and be happy it is very important to know that you have purpose in the first place and the right principles and habits that would be your guiding light to reach that purpose.
i would agree that much of the things that is popular these days are all about personality ethics, which is not good by the way, but is still absolutely necessary. take for example myself. i think i am developing my character ethics, thank be to God and his grace, but i am a loser when it comes to dealing with people. i have difficulty translating what i mean to the people i am around. and so i need to develop my personality ethics; leaping a thousand times more because as a leader i need to. how can i as a leader encourage and empower those around me when i myself could not communicate to them what it is that i truly want?
like mr. covey said in the previous paragraphs, we do trust people who we know have a good character to show for it. even if they are not skilled, they are not talented or they are not with pleasing personality
self-awareness is a tricky thing. usually because we only want to see what we want to see in ourselves sometimes. but i have learned that my ability to interact and communicate and be a "people person" is an acquired trait. and i do hope that people who are in my circle of influence will trust me, not because i have an amazing personality but because they see my character.
to conclude my own way of processing this observation by mr. covey:
i believe that true success depends in knowing your purpose and goals and doing all the right things, choosing your decisions base on the principles that you believe will give God the most glory.
after all, he is my reason for living.
personality ethics : human and public relations techniques and positive mental attitude are also necessary but in itself inadequate to affect lasting happiness and true success.
not related to the article whatsoever. i just think it is pretty :-) |
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