make me love you, Lord

been couch potato all day today. still lying on the couch and staring on my blank screen. i do not know what to write. 

every time i thought of writing something
i want to cry.
no, actually i want to bowl. 
i don't really know why
but of course that statement
is all wrap up in a lie.

have you searched my heart my God?
Have you found something of yours in there?
Have you seen the rough edges?
the callous and the actual emptiness?

You might not believe this my God
but despite all that 
this heart is longing for you
for your fulfillment 
for the flooding of your grace

this heart wants to fall in love with you
again and again and again
this heart wants to see beauty in everything
knowing that you are its everything

make me love you Lord
make me long for you
make me hunger for you
devastate my heart with your presence

that i may live my life
every single minute of it for the purpose
of serving you, of pleasing you, of loving you